How!? Is it time to walk away?

Hi. This is my first post but not my first when it comes to caregiving. This one is close to home, my mother. I had read so much here, and I think it's time for me to vent or tell my story. I have also read how others think we are here or caregiving for our parents’ money. I shake my head to that in most cases. I took care of a friend’s mother and stopped because I didn't feel comfortable with the things, she was asking me to do. My second was my father in-law who was a vet of WWII and I was honored to help in any way possible. It wasn't easy. 7 long months of wound care and stubbornness but we eventually became a good team. When I decided to let my mom move in with me, I knew this may be for the good or it possibly could go south. Great at first. I made her feel as though she never moved. She had gotten rid of most of her things beforehand and brought very little with her. She also sold her home and her old 1985 Buick which was a money pit. She really did the bare minimum to keep it drivable. She also was the type of woman all my life, if you can get anything for free it was all hers but lied to get it. Yes, these are my feelings. She lied on her application for disability and to the doctors on every visit. But I never said a work. Those visits were not my mother, at least who I knew she was. Yes, she has had a terrible sickness in her past, but she is a warrior in my mind. She fought through polio and a brain aneurysm. Still my warrior 27 yrs. age. Went back to work, quit but helped raise her grandchildren and did arts and crafts. All my life I felt sorry for her as she made me feel so, after divorcing my father she went on the hunt for the next and the next baby daddy. Over and over. She married a master carpenter, divorced then came the plumber next an electrician. Can you see the pattern? The whole house was remodel for her at a cost of her hustle of her web of men and what she could get. It has always been about her and still is. Her demands are strong. After 3 years of being here she knew I previously had been diagnosed with lupus several yrs before. I put everything on hold for her. Not knowing how this was going to take a toll on me physically and mentally with a narcissistic mother I decided it was best for me to put her in a home. She went dark on me 6 months prior to this discussion. At 48 she told me she had affairs on my father, and I was the product of one. It broke me to pieces. As if we were just having a friendly conversation. She canceled many appointments because she just didn't feel like going. Or if she saw a snowflake falling, she got an instant cold that day. I know I am rambling, but I need to get this off my chest. She is there and still calls with demands. She has thrown my name under the bus with family friends and others. It's been one thing after another. I’ve been told to walk away. I want to. I don't know how. She is still abusing me mentally, but I still care about her health and well-being... I'm having my flares and I'm not doing so well. My husband wants me to stop and better myself and get stronger. She just has a strong hold. I pray she loosens the grip. Thank you for listening.