Sibling gone off the rails.

In the last two years, my 92 year old father had had a change of heart and struggled in his decision to reach out to my older sibling who had been estranged from he and I for 2 decades. I had made my decision to terminate my relationship with her, after many years of her trying to control many moving parts of my young life. I had had a rocky relationship with our father. After the death of my mother, and dealing with a controlling older sister, and with both of them being drinkers, I knew I had to heal from both of them and ducked out until 2003. My aunt, urged me to contact my father and "give it a chance". He had stopped drinking. He wanted family once again, and his sobriety came with clarity.
I never minded helping or paying for any of his needs or his co-pays. I had it to give, and did it happily. This experience had shown my father that he was at a point in his life where he needed to get his affairs in order and to be prepared. Since my sister and he had had a falling out, it was purely up to me. My father sought out a lawyer, made an appointment all on his own, and I went with him. He did a survivorship on his deed with my name on it. It was at the lawyers suggestion.

After my father contacted my sister, I too began to speak with her. I had mixed feelings about it. She began giving advice and the control buttons were being pushed once again. We didn't trust each other. Still, I had a glad heart and some hope, which began to unravel quickly. She began to hold me responsible for my father owning guns. My father was/is licensed to own and carry a gun. I had tried to take them, and was told by a police officer that I was not legally allowed to do that. There had been a scare in the neighborhood with late night callers here and there, and it truly was making him uncomfortable. And yes, I was concerned. I also had tried to get his eye Dr. to declare him legally blind, and he directed me to contact Ohio BMV in Columbus, of which they directed me to get the eye Dr. to write a letter. Once again, the Dr. said he couldn't/wouldn't do that. After a few months of my sister grooming me to believing she "cared", and after dad worrying my sister over "trespassers", I believed her when she said she wanted to help.

My sister knew a couple of people connected to a decent enough place and it was a place I was familiar with in attending many weekend retreats there in the past. However, it wasn't what it used to be, especially after the 2020 pandemic hit. My sister had offered to pay for 3 years and signed a contract. I thought this was gracious. But cognitive dissonance began to rear its ugly head again when myself and my husband as POA's weren't getting any information anymore from the facility. My sister began poisoning the staff with twists and turns in telling them that we wanted Dad's house, and that we were even living in it! How do I know this? Because some of the nurses spouted and 8 minute long conversation into how my poor older WEALTHY sister had fallen victim her family once more in "trying to do something nice". All of that because she thinks her money buys control.

After she screamed at me on the phone one day over the house, my husband said we needed to consult an estate planning lawyer (who also knows about Medicaid) we were told not to sell, as the house is exempt and that Medicaid would deploy in the long run.
After a trip to the hospital due to a fall, and then back to supposed skilled care in which my father was left ALONE for 36 hours with no food for that duration, and also missed edema BY SKILLED, my father asked me to please take him out of there. Since I have experience in working with seniors, we made the decision to do so with much outside medical guidance and advice.
It was never about a house, or money. It's about dignity at the end of a tumultuous life. He deserves better than bologna sandwiches. His home is being sold as I post this, and his money will go to his in home care with professionals on site