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Can a step-parent who has Power of Attorney and has decided that a biological parent can not stay in the family home, determine that biological children of the parent who is in the memory care facility not speak or see their parent?
Depends on the specific wording of the document under which authority is granted. To me this seems like overreaching, but it also depends on the condition of the parent in memory care. I'm also kind of surprised that that individual would have granted authority to the step-parent. I assume the other biological parent isn't still living, or is otherwise out of the picture?
I have seen situations like this where the children never accepted the second wife. The marriage was often of long standing but the children abandoned the person UNTIL there was an estate, and the second wife might figure to inherit. Suddenly the biologicals have a whole lot of interest in their parent again. I honestly cannot imagine a person so evil as to keep children from a parent without some reason.
In all probability, yes. If your parent is not suffering dementia, and is asking to see you, then the POA "should" do all they can to carry out the wishes of the person they are acting for; if there is dementia then the POA acts "in the best interest of ....". Sometimes children swoop in to try to make changes to wills and POAs given freely by the person; sometimes, believe it or not, biological children go to war with the wife or husband for control over an elder and his or her finances. If he/she has POA the he/she is the Lion/Lioness at the Gate, and you would do very well to ask to see your parent with supervised visits if that's what it takes. Your parent gave control over things to his or her wife or husband, which is the person they chose most trustworthy in this care. That was their choice. Try to get along in the interest of the one you love. You might contact the Social Worker at the place and explain your position (NOT POA with the POA refusing your being allowed to see your parent). Ask is there is any way you can see your parent. They should know how best to advise you (or an administrator at the facility.) Good luck.
I am afraid that this is the case as he has been told by my stepmother that we do not want contact with him or to see him when we have been trying so hard to just have a few minutes to speak with him.
Capable yes. As POA I was asked to make a list of people who could take Mom out of the building. I guess I could have banned people if I felt they would cause strife in Moms life. It would have been in her best interest.
Sometimes POAs go beyond their responsibilities and I think this is one thing. It could be a control thing. If a child causes problems when they visit then the POA has a right to keep that person away.
I realize that ur a biological child. When you visit do you ask questions or complain about how Mom is treated, if so SDad may have been told this and chose to banned u.
I would wonder what his reasoning is. I may also consult with a lawyer on what ur rights are.
The sad thing is that he is asking to speak with us and to see us but my stepmother will not allow it. He has routinely asked, as have my sister and I in a very polite way to please be able to speak with him.
When someone grants another their POA, the agent is required to act in the best interest of the principal. I don't think the POA has the authority to restrict visitors. I don't see that as a healthcare issue unless the parents have worded the document that way which is very unlikely. Or if visiting by the children causes some traumatic behavior on the parent's part. Nor do I see the step parent having the authority to evict the bio parent from the family home unless the step parent is the owner.
I would contact an atty to get the issue resolved.
WG, I see below that you say that this is a person in memory care, and that this person is begging to see you, his children by blood? Who is telling you that your Dad is asking to see you? I would consult an elder law attorney. There is clearly a very troubled history with your stepmother. None of us can know what that might be. An attorney may be able to get you in for supervised visits in some way. I have to assume you have already thrown yourself upon the mercy of your stepmother? Have offered to make visits only in her presence? I wish you the best. A sad situation for the elder to be torn between his wife and his children.
I would call an attorney. The POA is in place to act as the person would want, not to impose their will on the person. Stopping visitation is not appropriate and makes you wonder what other decisions she is making that might be questionable.
When someone is granted POA, it is just that, they are receiving power to make decisions. Ask an attorney to explain the details to you. I listened to a program where an attorney went through what it actually meant. It’s very interesting what it entails.
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Sometimes children swoop in to try to make changes to wills and POAs given freely by the person; sometimes, believe it or not, biological children go to war with the wife or husband for control over an elder and his or her finances.
If he/she has POA the he/she is the Lion/Lioness at the Gate, and you would do very well to ask to see your parent with supervised visits if that's what it takes. Your parent gave control over things to his or her wife or husband, which is the person they chose most trustworthy in this care. That was their choice. Try to get along in the interest of the one you love. You might contact the Social Worker at the place and explain your position (NOT POA with the POA refusing your being allowed to see your parent). Ask is there is any way you can see your parent. They should know how best to advise you (or an administrator at the facility.) Good luck.
Sometimes POAs go beyond their responsibilities and I think this is one thing. It could be a control thing. If a child causes problems when they visit then the POA has a right to keep that person away.
I realize that ur a biological child. When you visit do you ask questions or complain about how Mom is treated, if so SDad may have been told this and chose to banned u.
I would wonder what his reasoning is. I may also consult with a lawyer on what ur rights are.
I would contact an atty to get the issue resolved.
I would consult an elder law attorney. There is clearly a very troubled history with your stepmother. None of us can know what that might be. An attorney may be able to get you in for supervised visits in some way. I have to assume you have already thrown yourself upon the mercy of your stepmother? Have offered to make visits only in her presence?
I wish you the best. A sad situation for the elder to be torn between his wife and his children.
Best wishes to you.